Every weekday morning, around 8am, I watch and wave to Hannah as she rides away on the big yellow school bus. And each time I do, a special piece of my heart breaks all over again. I am not sad that she is growing up, becoming more mature and confident, or learning new things. I appreciate those changes. It is because she is doing it away from me, our home, our family... during the week, she spends about five times more time sitting in school as she does playing at home.

I wish with all my heart that I could homeschool her. She would learn things much more quickly. She could have many many more hours with her parents, siblings and friends. We would have so many more opportunities for field trips and fun days and playtime and family time.

Last summer I was struggling with the decision to put her in public school. It hasn't been the ideal educational experience, but I know she has changed and grown a lot. I love seeing that she is more confident, less shy, more sure of herself. Now that we are moving next month, I have to decide on the best school for her in Orange County. The options are limited.

Last week I toured our new neighborhood's public school. The building itself was pretty nice, but the school receptionist couldn't tell me a lot of specifics about the student body, the way a typical student's day goes, the school's philosophy of learning. She basically just gave me a tour of the physical building, and vaguely answered some (not all) of my questions. It's kind of like taking a tour of a church building. You can look at bricks, mortar, and stained glass windows all day long, but it won't help you learn about the community of people, the atmosphere of worship, the ways God is working in their lives, or the reasoning behind why they do what they do.

All that being said, I am saddened at the prospect of continuing to send Hannah away for her education. I've always thought that learning should begin at home - why not just keep it there? My husband doesn't see it this way. He thinks homeschool is more trouble than it's worth, that it would be too much of an extra burden for me with three, possibly four children at home. I am not nagging or continuing to argue with him. Instead, I am coming up with a plan of action to convince him that we should give it another trial run later this summer. I am still formulating my plan, and everyday I pray that God will give me wisdom and clarity about this decision. If I'm not meant to homeschool at this time, I will honor that, but I want it to be made clear to us.

Mother's Day brunch

After church today, we got home around 1pm. As usual, Noah was asleep, but I made "brunch" for me and the kids: 6 sausages, 5 scrambled eggs, 4 pieces of toast with jelly, 3 cups of milk, 2 cheese sticks (1 for each girl), and a side of steamed broccoli and carrots. Guess who didn't eat any veggies?

If it wasn't raining. I'd love to go outside and use my new (that is, new-to-me) bike trailer.
I really need to get new bike helmets, for each one of us. 
Aliah has such a big head... I haven't found one that fits her properly yet.

Inspections and repairs.

Today we did inspections on the new house, and got back the inspection report for our little brown house. Mike is now completely stressed and overwhelmed at the amount of expensive repairs they are asking us to complete.... within the next 2-4 weeks. It's completely ridiculous. If you don't want to do any repairs, then don't try to buy a 32 year old house!

He actually said something like "Maybe we should just give up on the whole thing and walk away. Stay here for another year, do those major repairs bit by bit, and try to sell the house again next spring." Hopefully in a couple months we will be laughing at those words. I highly doubt that just giving up and not moving is the right answer. I don't know why he'd want to give up on the whole thing. But they are asking for some completely ludicrous repairs: replacing ALL the siding on the house? New windows and windowseals everywhere? Incorrect brace sizes on the deck and treehouse? And something about our AC not working properly (the unit was replaced in 2009!). SO many tedious things... Ugh it makes tired just thinking about all the money it would take to do what they are asking. There's just no way.

I love my husband, but sometimes he is just too headstrong.
Why would he give up now?
Who says we have to do any repairs, really?
Don't you get what you pay for?!